Smile even the world been really hard to me. Perhaps that is the best remedy to ease all the pain. Wake up every morning with big smile. Learn to understand why everything happened in positive way. I know I can be from nowhere to now here. I am so jijol!I didn’t spend my midterm break like I planned. I was sick for almost 5 days and finally recovered last khamisday. Aduyai, midterm’s coming. Isninday-psych nthen b.m.w nthen, arab and fim. Nex week well be really crucial week.
Anyway, I miss my best fren, I mean my former best fren. Hehee. I really miss him, well, last sem he will send me lodsa text saying he miss me, and not for this break. Not even forever. He hates me forever, that’s for sure. Thanks.After all, I really hoped this sem will finish faster. To warp everything and hopefully I pas everything, doing my short sem in smile and leave nilai and never come back. nilai thought me lodsa of thing, literally, nilai is a very boring place, death city for sure. Nevertheless, there are immense things that I couldn’t describe thru words to say how much I'm very grateful to nilai. Nilai.. nilai.. nevertheless I cant wait to get out since there will be no more fun in my dorm. I dunno with whom I want to stay with next short sem.
Pray for the best.
Back to my best fren.
Everyday when I looked at you, I feel really guilty. I know what I did was tremendously stupid. I’ve been blaming everyone (eventhough I didn’t say literally) but still, I blamed almost everyone and not myself ,To make myself not so guilty. But, I guess I need to stop. Whatever happened, so just handle the guiltiness for the rest of my life? Congrats jijol. Every time I'm lonely I will think about it, to make myself please, I would firing everyone and start to hate everyone, including myself and I’ve realised bodohnya kau jijol. And I'm tired. And I'm lonely and I miss u again noonoooo...ok serious balik. After all, I did my part to say sorry, do u know I sent 7*3=21 pages to apology, and now up too u to forgive me. anyway, biarlah.
And this sorry goes to you.
Just to express my anger. Sorry for neglecting you all this while, I shout really loud and say u cunt (and pretend I dun understand the meaning) because I was really pissed off with you. I want to say sorry but I dun think I have the guts to say sorry. And it was my fault. I still keep ur tex, the long tex. 7 pages! Hihi, and still read the text sometimes. *those who dun learn to forgive will suffer.* thanks yazid.
So then, I still have my frens. And I'm really glad my fren really love me. give me support and every thig that I need. Even for slightest thing, such as *I get migrane and I went to doc I think I should stop consuming Nescafe.. bla.. blaa..* and then *jol, u know now u should stop blaa.. bla..* u know even this simplest thing really meaningful. Hehe =)))) thanks for being my fren.
Anyway, though u not going to read this, you know that u are the best thing that ever happened to me. Among the best thing-lah. U know almost everything about myself, u know I never hold any friend (with the same gender). U know, even I’ve been neglecting you, I still miss you. it just that.. I prefer to remain silent until you finally forgive me.
*I will save all the text msg-es that I think that sweet, hehehe. I just love all
the sweet-sweet things and I'm so sweet.
All I hear is rain drop falling from the rooftop, uuhhh tell me why do u have to go, cause this pain wont go away, and today... its been a month and I officially missing you.
p/s-In case u haven’t noticed
I have deactivated my facebook acc. I have no intention to delete all the fun-ness by using social network. I deactivated my facebook acc since I dun find any reason why should continue using facebook. Nevertheless I always do something that I eventually regret. Just like when I’ve deleted my myspace acc, I start up a new in less than week.
It was two years ago.
Anyway, I'm still the coolest jiglo. I can predict my demam and predict when I gonna sihat. Hehehe, I'm so cool.I'm going to change my number and hopefully my handphone by end of this year. Perhaps I need to change. Attitude adjustment, someone just sparked me. thanks.every time I introspect myself, I think I have problem with myself. I dun even know how to express it. Can I take break from jadi jijol and other person instead? Of course no. Sooo.. jijol just be yourself. Doesn’t matter if other people talk bad about you, *but you are responsible for yourself. So, dun say any bad words to you*-quote from the love guru.
Love u jijol. Ur the best.
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