.

i opt out for short sem, though I know I am supposed to grab short sem to fulfill my credit hour in order to advance to 2nd year. However, I refused due to the long semester break offer by all public university. and for sure, by these time I should be working, nonetheless I'm still looking though. hehe

anyway short semester deff not my thaing anymore. I had been through during matriculation and it was nitemare to me. seriously, 2 depressive months. I was lucky i didnt go crazy during and after short semester.

I still remember waking up in the room used to be occupied by 18  people  and at that time it was only me with my friend  living in that room, facing the same face everyday.

and I still remember for the first time I felt so lonely. 

I had exam on computer exam on sabtuday and  I cant go back, and stuck in nilai. sleeping with lights on and something wrong with my lap top adapter and worse i ter-left my phone. waking at four *I thought da pukul 6 sebab terang* went to have breakfast and realized baru pukul 4++. stay up until 8, finish my exam pack my stuff and blah from nilai.

it wasnt easy going though short sem, it was really hard. seriously.  7 depressive weeks *i wasnt in nilai during final week because i had 6 days gap for exam. looking for friend to hang out with, and god knows how scary it was to sleep alone in that room. seriously, I overheard chairs was moving in the study room while  going to toilet. and toilet was even more horror. I still remember somewhere around 3 or 4 am i heard someone was showering. terus tak jadi nak pee. nak kejutkan ifran, but he was in deep sleep. tak sampai hati plak.I can endure all these scary thing, and the worst part was,

pretend I didnt see you while we were pass though. it was hell devastating. haish, boleh menangis ingat benda ni tau

roaming around looking for something fun to do and end up in library reading or maybe surfing internet. deactiavte and re-activate my social network and all other nonsense acts. listening to all emo shits song, watching emo shits movies. haish, seriously, sedih gilerr

I know, main campus would be different. nahh.. these depressive thang have always hunting me. try to look over 2010. I was surprised looking at all the aftermath that I tend to spill everything in the form of word. and somehow, after all these time, I realized it wasnt worth writing let alone remembering it. and all these nonsensical depressive *berapa banyak aku ulang ni?* finally abated. weird huh?

nite :)